dont walk in front of me
because i wont follow

dont walk behind me
because i wont lead

walk with me,
try

because friendships should be like honey stars
sweet to perfection

but then i realized
not always.

and i start to wonder
where did i gone wrong

when all i've done is to follow my blood
trying to be myself

i feel distanced
by the ones i really cared

my so called tomodachis
isnt really there

i thought carefully
and pondered

as if it was a dream
made of chocolate sundae ice cream

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its not easy to find an emo breeze,
one with a ghostly howl,
carrying the scent of a nearby rain,
dark clouds conquering the sky's domain.

its not easy to find a perfect sky
one blue so deep and bright,
carrying a sense of tranquility,
with seagulls & swallows in sight.

its not easy to find the perfect night,
one warm , quiet and starry,
carrying a mood of solitude,
damn that was lovely.

yet no perfection's so hard to find,
as of that which i extend,
and which i hope you will ever treasure
none other then to simply be your friend.

because the world is full of people
who will laughingly pretend
but when its said and done
consider yourself lucky you've gt a friend.

and yes , i m grateful for that.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i dont know if i will be able to trust again , after knowing about the lies that was speared in between.

till then , i ll just let my thoughts dance upon the wind.

dont know which direction i m heading, and where ive been isnt much to speak of.

flying a kite made of glass & paper thread, hoping it would go aloft.

2010

new year resolutions :

1. focus more on actions that has big impacts on my life , rather then actions that will just keep me busy.

2. to have a strong bias for action, and now, rather then tommorow.

3. to be able to laugh at myself and the world more.


To be able to push myself , to be able to focus on my job and to feel happiness for the very first time is a luxury i have not had for many years.

I have grown resilient , and i must move , plan things ahead with greater resolve and not spend time wasting away mourning on yesterday's sorrows and misfortunes.

The time has come, to shed off old skins and habits ,in order to become a better person, a better human being.

Now go , and live 2010.

A blessed and gorgeous year is awaiting, ronald !! :O

i m a little depressed =x

..........

.........


........


.........


knowing that i'd never be able to find her again.

ron is walking his own path =]

Witch Doctor


Vol'Jin is a risk-taker. Anyone who has ever crossed paths with him can tell you that. As a voodoo priest, you need a certain degree of it. It's too bad he never learned the value of discretion. Vol'Jin's experiments in jungle magic yielded brilliant results- the ability to mend wounds, casks filled with paralyzing combinations of herbs that could scatter for miles, and even a curse capable of stripping the life force from a living being. Of course, no amount of power gained goes without notice. As Vol'Jin's experiments became more and more unstable and destructive, the Lich King made his move.


*looks at da picture and vivid memories came flashing* *smiles*

~

mourning's over.

an eventful week it was .

i 'm tired as hell.

working towards a gracious winter.

does it even exist ? such silly thinking, i know.

some1 once said , you cant repay your parents in this life.

even my parents said that too.

if i put myself in their shoes a little , i might understand that . possibly because they had many commitments & priorities in their own life , and their parents understand & feel happy for them. get involved with the society, go out and explore the world , experience and learn things, good.
and because their parents are happy that their children are growing up & the children felt happy too.

even my parents said that too. they wanted me to see the world, learn stuffs etc etc.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

this is me .

1. i believe, when my parents give birth to me.. its because they love each other .

2. the day i was born , a contract was made. the deal wasnt to be able to do the right things in their eyes, or give them all the money in the world , or living according to societal standards, or find a life of my own.

i strongly feel that i m obliged to stay by their side . i always thought of my parents as this..why do u give me all this freedom and chance to live such different lives ? why wouldnt u make me a slave from the start... i would rather , and happily work for you forever .. but u had to let me make all the decisions by myself , knowing i am young ,unwise& immature at the point of time. i made lots of mistakes and u werent exactly happy. u were dissapointed with me, i know.

u made me go to tuition like other parents would. but i wouldnt produce out the happiest desired results . u encouraged me to study hard, and went on about your lecture on how papers could make a difference in life. but i dont want all these. life is not just about studying and working.. i just wanted to spend more time with you. just 3 of us together. but work took you away from me.

i grow up frusfrated , and when frusfration builds up , it changes a person. i turned to my friends to seek comfort, and that distanced away me from you. i became rebellious in my teens, & became a hot headed & stubborn. i refuse to acknowledge you as my teachers , as leaders although you were my parents. such were my short sightedness and views at that time.

u could never , become my friend.

and thats when the gap widened , further separating us apart.

i always said " you dont understand me " without looking in their shoes. just my feelings alone, so selfishly alone.

but these few months, i spend most of my time at home, reflecting & trying to put myself in their shoes. Eureka =)

rite now, let me rephrase myself. I m repaying my parents not to brush off of the mistakes i had made in the past, or to ease my guilt, but that i had a blood contract with them. I will stay by their side & help them out. Wherever they go , my heart will always be with them.

condolence.

When we lose someone we love, it seems that time stands still.

What moves through us is a silence, a quiet sadness, a longing for one more day, one more word, one more touch, we may not understand why you left this earth so soon, or why you left before we were ready to say good-bye, but little by little, we begin to remember not just that you died, but that you lived.

those who withered,

and that your life gave us memories too beautiful to forget.

those at present,

may the love of those around you help you through the days ahead & hold tight to memories for comfort.